I've looked into mods but have been avoiding them for the time being, trying to see what I can get away with simply using console. I'll look into tricking the game into thinking i'm married to them, though with the sorry state of Khajiit marriage Bethesda left us with in Skryim I'm not sure if that'll be possible. Not sure how to make them persistent in any way. I've changed him quite significantly, removed from all factions other than the ones needed for a follower and stats/items. Attempts to locate them with the moveto code usually fail, likely because they're not unique? No idea. I've never noticed them despawning, not sure how to test that. But if you have changed the NPC significantly with the console to be a regular, persistent character, can you make it also 'married' to you with the console, even though you cannot go through a marriage or get any relevant dialogue? My other suggestion would be to try a mod to have more than one follower if you are unable to dismiss your generic one without losing him/her. You may need to do some experiments to see if your new follower will despawn if you dismiss him/her. Except, normally, the generic 'race' NPCs despawn.
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